Overheard - a young childless couple saying "I would never let my kids do that." Really? How would you know?!
I want childless people to stop thinking they know what's best for other people's children. I want parents of young children to stop thinking they know what's best for teenagers. And I want parents of teenagers to stop thinking they know what's best for young adult children. I want parents of one child to stop thinking they know how to parent multiple children. I want parents of only girls to stop thinking they know how to parent boys. And vise versa. Seeing a trend here?
I once caught myself thinking that I wouldn't do something that my friend with five kids was doing. But I only have two kids. Totally different. Maybe if I had five kids I would do the same. How would I know!? My kids are so different from each other, and so different from other kids, that I can't even comment on other families with the "same" set-up: two kids/a boy and a girl/teenagers. I also remember, before I had my own children, commenting on the parenting abilities of a friend's kids. I knew I was right. In fact, I knew everything back then. And then I had kids of my own. Game changer! I remember hearing a friend say "I hate when parents talk to their kids when they are on the phone with me. When I have kids I'll never do that." And then they do. And worse, deny that they ever said that. Sheesh.
What I'm saying is that every family dynamic is different. And no one should be thinking "Hey, I would do it better if I were in your shoes." Because you have no idea what it's like to be in those shoes. You are too busy strutting your own shoes to know any better.
No comments:
Post a Comment